Guy: Avada Kedavra is so romantic!
- McTavish

Girl 1: Let’s make a shrine
Girl 2: Of what?
Girl 3: Your mom.
- RVC

Guy to girl: Yeah I’ve started research for that paper. I’ve pretty much gone to websites and seen that they exist.
- Otto Maass before a poli sci class

Girl 1: There isn’t much gang violence in Montreal, or at least you don’t hear about it.
Girl 2: That’s only because it’s all in French.
- RVC dorm

Girl: Stop calling women objects or tools! Women are NOT tools!
Guy: Of course they aren’t tools. Tools are useful.
- McGill Arena

Guy on the phone: I don’t know bro…I mean, maybe I should’ve just lied and said I love her.
- Redpath Library

Guy (on Cell Phone) “Dude, I know you totally just got out of jail, but it is going to be alright man school is great.”
- Outside Leacock

Dude 1: I saw Rambo over the weekend.
Dude 2: Was it good?
Dude 1: It’s good if you like action movies. You should see it.
Dude 2, (trepidatiously): Yeah… I haven’t seen the first ones, though.
- cultural studies

Student: You know, in the circular vascatory system…wait…don’t overheard that!
-Ghetto

Prof: Has anyone ever been intimate with a cow?
— Biology 205, Adams Auditorium

Student on cell phone: Hey, do you want to come see a play with me tonight? Ya? It’s the “Taming of the Shrew,” it’s based on that movie: “Ten Things I Hate About You!”
- Arts Building West Wing

Professor: 1984 - OK, on the negative side it’s a dictatorship, so you can’t have sex when you want but on the other hand, people make your decisions for you and you’ve got a job for life.
- EAST 211

Engineer 1: Valentines is coming up. What should i get my girlfriend?
(long pause)
Engineer 2: Does she like Star Wars?
- engineering common room

Prof: It took me forever to convince my university alma mater that I was dead. I had to send things back marked “deceased” for years.
- GEOG 300

Prof: If we were all in this room naked, we’d be pretty ugly to look at.
- Phil. Foundations of Ed., Education Faculty

Squeegee guy (holding bucket of water and talking on his cell phone): Hello?…. On fire?!…. Holy fuck, I’ll be right there.
- Lower Field

Birthright rep: Excuse me, are you Jewish?
Gentile: No, I’m not, sorry. But Shabbot Shalom, eh?
- Leacock Lobby

Prof: So, minimal standards of living in Canada are very different to Togo.
Student: What the fuck is Togo?
- ECON 209

Girl: I’m sorry, I don’t speak geek!-OH! Do you have Transformers?
- de Bullion

Prof: There are typically three signs that indicate a child may be at risk for developing pyschotic tendencies. What are they?
Student: Pyromania, mutilating or killing animals, and early sexual tendencies.
Prof: That’s right. Now if you’re a parent and your kid is having sex with flaming animals, I would get that checked out.
- McConnell 13

Guy: …so if you win, you get a free trip to Chicago, and if you win in Chicago, you get a free trip to Israel.
Girl: GOD!!! You Jews and your free trips. I need to invest myself in a religion so I can go traveling too!
- McTavish

(Ed. Note: This is the first time someone has ever submitted a quote that overheard me (I’m ‘Guy’))

Guy: Oh My God that girl has a HUGE ass, but I love it.
- Astrobiology seminar

Prof: Now, I don’t want to alarm you, but what I am really trying to say here is if you like sex… watch out.
- BIOC 212

Girl 1: Ron Paul? Isn’t he a porn star?
Girl 2: Nope, that’s Ron Jeremy.
- Outside of New Rez

Guy 1: Why you bending over like that?
Guy 2: Oh just stretching up for the vicious rape that is the midterm.
- Bronf 151

Girl: OH MY GOD, Heath Ledger died!
Guy: HOLY SHIT, REALLY?! Thank God they finished filming The Dark Knight in time.
- Outside the McGill Gym

Girl: I’m so tired I think I’m gonna kill myself.
Guy: (Walking away) Alright, gimme a call.
- Outside Burnside Hall

Girl1: So now I’m wondering if I’m pregnant, or just getting fat…
Girl2: Oh my god, I hope you’re pregnant, at least then you can get an abortion!
- BMH

Girl 1: Don’t worry. She’s your friend. Of course she’s going to forgive you for sleeping with her boyfriend. It’s what friends do.
Girl 2: Yeah… thanks. You’re probably right. I wonder if he’s busy tonight.
- University St.

Guy: You know, with long hair, when you see a homeless person you feel like you can really relate to them. You Know? It’s like saying ‘I can relate. I can feel you, I’m on your side.’
- New Rez